Tom Xu, Chinese who has overseas working experience
Chinese media, “Yesterday, a hurricane attacked California, killed 3 and hurt 20.”
Western media, “Yesterday, a hurricane attacked Zhejiang province of China, killed 3 and hurt 20. Hi, Tracy, what do you think of Chinese government’s role in this tragedy? ”
“I have no idea what the government has done, but I saw some policemen run across the road in the rain.”
“Oh, What were they doing? Were they trying to arrest or kill those who are not satisfied with CCP in dealing with the disaster? ”
“Eh~~~I can’t say that because I have no evidence, but I saw they were running very quickly, they looked very anxious.”
“All right, at least we can say the Chinese government could do better if they had a democratic system like ours. Do you agree?”
“Yeah, probably.”
中国媒体：“昨天，一场飓风袭击了加州，造成3人死亡，20人受伤。”
西方媒体：“昨天，一场飓风袭击了中国浙江省，造成3人死亡，20人受伤。你好，特雷西，你如何看待中国政府在这场悲剧中所扮演的角色？”
“我不知道政府做了什么，但我看到一些警察在雨中跑过了马路。”
“哦，他们在干什么？他们是想逮捕或杀死那些对中国救灾措施不满意的人吗？”
“嗯……我不能这么说，因为我没有证据，但我看到他们跑得很快，他们看起来很焦虑。”
“好吧，至少我们可以说，如果中国政府有像我们这样的民主制度，他们可以做得更好。你同意这一点吗？”
“是的，可能吧。”
Chinese media, “Russian customs detained a group of Chinese citizens for suspecting the brine in their bags is methamphetamine hydrochloride, Chinese departments concerned are negotiating with the Russian side.”
Western media, “Russian customs arrested some Chinese drug traffickers, the Chinese argued that it’s ‘brine’ instead of ice, what do you think, william? ”
“Yes, no evidence has shown what they were carrying is drug by now, but you know the Russian are doing everything to limit people’s freedom under the dictatorship of Putin.”
“Yeah, what is ‘brine’ by the way?”
“The Chinese say that’s something needed to make tofu.”
“Tofu? That’s boring. Why did the Chinese carry tofu from China to Russia? ”
“Oh, I think that’s because Chinese have nothing to eat except tofu. You know you will be executed if you eat something not allowed by the communist party.”
“Is it possible that the Chinese are not allowed to make tofu inside China hence they have to flee to Russia to make it?”
“Er…I am not sure, but…maybe.”
“Maybe the Chinese think Tofu is very delicous and they are not used to the Russian food! …What will be the opinion of Putin on tofu?”
“Maybe he thinks it tastes like shit, hahahaha!”
“Yes! Hahaha!”
中国媒体：“俄罗斯海关拘留了一批中国公民，怀疑他们包里的卤水是盐酸脱氧麻黄碱，中方有关部门正在与俄方进行谈判。”
西方媒体：“俄罗斯海关逮捕了一些中国毒贩，中国人说这是‘盐水’而不是冰毒，你怎么看，威廉？”
“是的，目前没有证据表明他们携带的是毒品，但你知道，在普京独裁统治下，俄罗斯正在竭尽全力限制人民的自由。”
“对了，‘卤水’是什么？”
“中国人说这是做豆腐的原料。”
“豆腐？这很无聊。为什么中国人要把豆腐从中国运到俄罗斯去？”
“哦，我想那是因为中国人除了豆腐什么都不吃。你知道，如果你吃了CCP不允许你吃的东西，你就会被处决。”
“中国人不允许在国内做豆腐，因此他们不得不逃到俄罗斯去做豆腐，有可能是这样吗？”
“呃……我不确定，不过……也许吧。”
“也许中国人认为豆腐很美味，他们不习惯俄罗斯的食物！普京对豆腐有什么看法？”
“也许他觉得味道像狗屎，哈哈哈！”
“是啊！哈哈哈！”
原文链接：https://www.zhihu.com/question/21901048/answer/737284200
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