不喜歡台灣的理由

下文來自於某部落格，主要是抱怨外國人在台的經驗。此文馬上引發一連串的回應是外國人針對台灣環境、文化以及人們不滿的怨言。基本上應該都是在台灣教過書或者就是ABC的發言。

[本人是道地的台中台灣人，英文算還可以，我盡我所能翻譯給大家參考。我的目的是想讓英文沒那麼好的人看看駐台外國人的想法，不是要恥台灣，以下筆者或是回言者的觀點有些比較偏極，但是我覺得還是可以用客觀角度來看看。]

版主發言
I should start this series of posts by first mentioning that I’m not a hater. That said, no matter where you go, some things will piss you off, regardless of how open-minded, PC, assimilation-ready you are. Taiwan’s a great country, but it has its rough patches. Here’s one:

It was a rainy winter day in Taipei today. I wore my work shoes today. Unfortunately, the soles of my shoes aren’t exactly Gore-Tex super grip recycled F1 rubber or anything like that. I say unfortunately because whenever it rains here in Taipei (which is often), I slip on the marble-tiled sidewalks which seem to skirt every bank and post office in town. I’m pretty sure that most salarymen here experience the same, slippery imbalance every rainy day.

Luckily, the designers didn’t totally ignore this seemingly obvious flaw. Most of the marble-tiled footpaths have thin “friction strips,” as I like to call them. They aren’t the polished slip-traps of the marble tile, but are rough and cling to your shoe. They’re like buoys in a vast ocean that I tentatively jump to in order to keep from sliding around and bumping into people, or worse, making myself look foolish. If only there were more of these strips.

部落版主最初聲明了他沒有惡意，也期待會被罵，只是想說點自己的心聲。他主要是在不爽為什麼台北街道到處都鋪用大理石，下雨後地上易滑，版主常為此摔倒，而為什麼當地人不改善這種地板鋪作的方法？但還好有些較細心的設計師會鋪上防滑的阻力線條，以防路人滑倒、撞上他人、讓自己丟臉。


回覆 #1
Edi says:
Quite complaining! LOL Be glad you have sidewalks!! I get now sidewalks down here in Pingtung which means I get to walk along the side of the street with scooters and bikes. Can you imagine what that is like??
Edi 說:
別抱怨了! 你該慶幸你們有人行道，在屏東只能走在自行車和機車的一旁，你能想像嗎?


回覆 #2
mike says:
That’s true… it could be worse. You live in Pingtung, eh? That’s the REAL Taiwan! Getting down to Kending a lot?
mike 說:
真的... 更糟糕的都有咧。你住屏東？那是"道地的台灣"! 常去墾丁嗎?


回覆 #3
接下來這位筆者的回覆較有攻擊性:

Jim says:
Things I hate about Taiwan:
Jim 說:
討厭台灣的東西:
1. Annoying recorded messages blaring on megaphones over and over again.
令人厭惡的廣播器，重覆的廣播一樣的訊息
2. The screechy nasal sound of Taiwanese shouting into a cell phone when you’re hung over.
宿醉時聽到台灣人大聲講電話的聲音 尖銳又多鼻音
3. Taiwanese language in general
台灣語言
4. Probably the world’s worst music
世界上最差的音樂
5. People feeling the need to stare at a computer or TV in every possible situation
任何時候 都有著必須盯著電視或電腦看的需求
6. Having to dumb down your conversations to banal pleasantries with everyone you communicate with
必須對每個人限制對話於平庸無味的寒暄，
7. The smell of Bien Dang on the train and listening to some guy slurping a piece of 7-11 cooked pork down next to you.
火車上聞到便當的味道，加上聽到旁人吃7-11燒豬吃的"西西速速"
8. Being asked the same questions by everyone you meet.
到處都被問一樣的問題
9. Generally awkward socializing.
人與人社交時的尷尬
10. The pollution
汙染
11. Horribly bad fashion misses
對時尚的誤解
12. Not a whole lot of art here
當地藝術品的缺乏
13. “Clubs” in Taiwan = 40 year old white guys trying to pick up 22 year olds and bad techno music.
台灣的夜店，40歲白人男子釣22歲的妹，還有爛電子音樂
14. Guys taking pictures of themselves and teasing their hairsprayed hair
男生自拍，愛雕髮、玩頭髮
15. People in general taking pictures of themselves
一般自拍的習慣
16. The general cluelessness about art, culture etc. in general. (Where else on earth can Air Supply still sell out a concert and Dylan can’t find a venue?)
對藝術與文化的無知，為何"空中補給合唱團"演唱會能大賣，而"巴布狄倫" 卻連場地都找不到?
17. All the foreigners being English teachers and most of them lost souls.
外國人都是英文老師，且是出賣靈魂的外國人
18. Said foreigners being able to make 2x the salaries of Taiwanese 5x as smart and hard working as them, and getting women out of their league as a result.
外國人英文老師薪資是台灣人的兩倍，但台灣人的聰明跟努力卻是外國人的五倍 結果外國人因此成功"越級打怪"
19. Tropical Island and I can’t get weed anywhere dammit.
熱帶氣候，買不到大麻，肯
20. People who live here for over 5 years and can’t speak any Chinese (see #18)
在台灣住了超過五年 還不會講中文


回覆 #4
Jim says:
Oh, and ICRT
Jim 說:
噢，還有台北國際社區廣播電台

回覆 #5
The drunk and sober says:
July 6, 2010 at 12:38 pm
You know what,I totally agree with soome of the points you said.
*The screechy nasal sound of Taiwanese shouting into a cell phone when you’re hung over.
*Taiwanese language
*Probably the world’s worst music(No wonder Jay Chou and Jolin aren’t popular worldwide.Oh wait,who are those people I’ve just mentioned???)
*Being asked the same questions by everyone you meet(Ah yes,the questions being asked by ugly ass stalkers and retarded chink hoes especially in Ximen Ding)
*Having to dumb down your conversations to banal pleasantries with everyone you communicate with
*Generally awkward socializing.
*The pollution(and not to mention the amount of dog shits and littering)
*Horribly bad fashion misses(They’ve got bad taste in clothes and jewelry,it’s like they’re so yesterday like their ancient chink forefathers)
*Not a whole lot of art here(No style and taste=No sense of creativity,that’s why they have to copy one another.Fucktards….)
*The general cluelessness about art, culture etc. in general
*Tropical Island and I can’t get weed anywhere dammit(Now that you’ve mentioned it,I need to smoke some just to get away from this reality of hell.Taiwan=Suicidal Ville)
Here are some of the things I despise:
*the annoying immature hoes you see on Yoyo TV(looks like they need a good f*ck in their tight chink vagina and a cock to thrust inside their chink mouths so they can just shut the f*ck up)
*Taiwanese people trying to speak “English”
*the old people(anywhere they are and everything they do)
*Taiwanese people acting like blacks trying to street dance and listening to hip hop thinking they’ve already blend into the modern young life when they don’t know they’re just as old as their ancient forefathers when they still have all the old traditional values like respect and honor your elders,study hard and learn to live like a retarded nerd who thinks he/she is cool enough to blend in with the outside world)
*annoying young pricks who sell stuff and ask you questions(man,to be practical,they should sell off their ugly skinny ass chink bodies instead to earn their college intuition fees)
*People who think they aren’t Chinese but Taiwanese.(Come on,Taiwan is nothing compared to China!I mean to be sarcastic,”What is a Taiwan?” Oh it’s a small island located right next to China but I don’t see any small island on the map! [Gets a magnifying glass] Ah…..that’s better!Whoa it looks really small and deserted comparing to China where it’s humongous!)
*The old ugly houses piled in a small ghetto altogether.(Ugh!I’ve never seen anything uglier in my life!)
*the weather(It’s all so fucked up!)

[這咖寫得很亂，我就直接翻大綱]

*你知道嘛，我完全同意你的某些看法!
*爛音樂，周杰倫 蔡依林在國際上根本就沒名
*在西門町被中國婊常問一堆沒意義的問題，還有醜不拉機的變態跟蹤人
*狗大便 垃圾
*沒品味，跟他中國豬的祖先沒兩樣沒品
*沒創意、沒藝術，只會抄襲
*沒大麻，更沒法脫離這人間地獄、天殺的地方
*幼幼台的嫩婊，看了很想***，然後再**** 讓她閉嘴
*學講英文的台灣人
*老人的所作所為
*學黑人跳街舞、聽嘻哈，自以為很前衛，但思想還是很古板、書呆
*自認不是中國人，是台灣人，台灣根本比不上中國，地圖上不用放大鏡看不到
*又舊又醜的房子排成一堆就像廢區


回覆 #4
A G says:
Iam so surprised that no one mentioned…

The fucking stares by everyone (if your foreign.)

The fucking repeating ‘welcome’ in mandarin everytime a shop door opens, like there programmed to fucking say that gwanning sound.

Tons of people on the train even when its fucking late…The place is like one giant ant hive with everyone flowing over each other.

I walk 50 metres and my hair and clothes are ruined by my own sweat, which makes just about everything a mission.

and yes the stares, i f*cking hate it, people watching me eat, watching me on the train, f*ck i bet they have a way to watch me wank. Mind your own fucking business!

A G 說:

- 超驚訝沒人提到到處都有人瞪著你看(如果你是外國人的話)
- 每個門口安裝自動"歡迎光臨"令人賭爛的聲音
- 晚上捷運還是一大堆人，根本就像個蟻窩
- 每走五十公尺整頭整身都是汗，很難做事
- 被瞪著看，超討厭吃也被看，坐車也要被瞪，信不信我**他們也有辦法偷看，少看少多管閒事!





-------------- [大家如果想再看下去 我再po]




回覆 #5
A G says:
and oh i forgot.

People dont have any fucking manners, just barge you and push in front of you and shit. Almost everyone would push in front of you and feel no way about it.

They all walk so fucking slow and they take up the whole sidewalk fuckkk!!!

I have to wait 72 seconds just to cross a road because it is over run by ants riding scooters.

And i swear some taiwanese girls try to deliberately walk into you…like they think that its going to lead to some fucking romantic encounter that they see in Hollywood….NO iam not interested piss off. p.s and stop fucking staring at me with those fucking eyes.

A G 說:
- 還有，人們很沒禮貌，又擠又推插隊樣樣來
- 插隊一點也不會歹勢
- 走得又慢
- 過個馬路要72秒，就因為機車
- 我能肯定有些台灣女生會故意來撞我，自以為會像電影裡的浪漫情節就來撞上我，沒興趣
- PS 別瞪著我看!




回覆 #6
ho says:
The buildings and the planning. Ugly houses with bars on their windows. Interior design in offices are horrible! Its like going back to the 70s. No sidewalks. Everything is squares of concrete.

ho 說:
- 建築與都市計畫
- 架鐵窗的醜陋屋子
- 辦公室室內設計很糟糕，像是回了70年代
- 沒人行道
- 到處都是方形的水泥製品




回覆 #7
Rafa Lechester says:
wow, don’t you guys need a license to be THAT narrow-minded and stupid? gee didn’t know all foreigners were dumb like this


Rafa Lechester 說:
哇 是不是得討張核准才能講出像你們這樣又笨又偏執的話 切.. 不知道所有外國人都這麼呆




回覆 #8
me says:
some things i hate about taiwanese people.

( im talking about 1 out of 10 taiwanese people)

1. taiwanese people are plastic. they are friendly in front of you and talk to you nicely, but they are saying something bad about you everytime you turn your back.

2. they love complaining. even in the simplest mistakes..

3. taiwanese will invent stories , they will make-up stories just to prove that you did something wrong to them.

4. taiwanese people cannot be trusted. tried and tested already. im a tourist guide here in the philippines and i cater to taiwanese groups. all fil-chi tourist guides know that taiwanese people cannot be trusted.


me 說:
有些我討厭台灣人的原因

(我是在說10%的人)

1. 台灣人很膚淺，在你面前會表示友善、說好話，一但你背對他們就馬上說壞話
2. 愛計較，就算是最微小的錯誤
3. 台灣人會編故事，編故事來證明你對他們做錯事
4. 不能信任台灣人，試過也測過，我在菲力賓當導遊，我帶的都是台灣人，所有中菲導遊都知道台灣人信不過!




回覆 #9
not the asshole jim up there, drunk and sober, nor j says:
Rafa Lechester :
wow, don’t you guys need a license to be THAT narrow-minded and stupid? gee didn’t know all foreigners were dumb like this

Finally, someone who is speaking up. In addition, America are the fucking narrow minded ones, not the taiwanese. You are fucking white, so I wonder why you would turn heads, dumbfuck. Also, if you fucking hate the Taiwanese, why are you living there? Don’t tell me you’re also one of the fucking losers who teach english in taiwan. Furthermore, in my opinion, I bet you are living in fucking Taiwan because you were despised in America, which you probably believe is “so nice and peaceful”.

not the asshole jim up there, drunk and sober, nor j 說:
終於有人出來講話，美國人才思想偏執，不是台灣人。你們都是TMD白人，不然怎麼會有人瞪著你看，呆。如果你這麼討厭台灣，那幹嘛還不走?別跟我說你是在台灣教英文的敗類，跟你賭你會住在台灣是因為你在美國被排擠，你又美又和平的美國。